如果明天世界末日

如果明天世界末日
我应该是会在地狱看着你们在上面享受

人生在世只不过是为了死后的生命
我这一生
没什么功劳
如果明天就结束
我真的觉得很后悔

为什么我那么迟才觉悟
那么迟才开始认真

如果有如果
如果我早一些觉悟
早一点认真工作
我一定不会落此地步

如果明天我真的出现在神面前
我还有没有机会哀求？

我真的不要下地狱！

激发大志！

这 3 个星期
不是吃Pringles 和 secret recipes 那么简单

经历了许多事情
这些事
我已准备好将来我能够应付的
可是
当我处在现场
不知道为什么
预测中的我和现场的我完全相反
回想起那个不知所措的我
我真的很失望
很惭愧
为什么我会这样笨？那么无能

我在想一想
我真的没有资格胜任这份神圣的工作
将来的我
很大可能会误人子弟
到底我该怎么办？

最后我决定
靠自己！
让自己有这个资格
我决定充实这方面

将来
我不要成为那些栽培精英的老师
因为那些精英靠自己也能成为精英
我要帮助真正需要帮助的学生！

那些所谓的“坏学生”
我已经了解他们的苦处
我已经了解他们的感受
可是我就是想不出办法来！
好无能！！！！


我要当个货真价实的辅导员！

我不会再容许自己眼巴巴地看着他们堕落而自己什么也办不到！

Can I?

我开始怀疑自己，
是否能够当一位老师和辅导员？

我应该办不到，
是否应该放弃？

除了逃，我还能怎样？

终于
生气了

今天的雨很短
可能天气比较躁
又好像比较多东西做，超忙
他们又一直来烦
结果我爆了
他们在午觉时间一直吵
我忍不下
生气起来
喊了一句：“你们不要弄我生气哈！”

顿时
觉得自己没有忍耐的心
我不敢面对生气的我
我无法面对，就逃跑了

回到家出气
把忍了很多天的所有所有让人很不耐烦的东西全在家抛出来

幸好妈妈煮的茶和Asam Laksa
让我停下
我爱妈妈

现在冷静想一想
这样的事发生在我班的话，我该怎么办？
那时怎么能够逃呢？
除了逃
我还能怎样？

现在我在学校，生气的时候也是逃走
我觉得这是最好的选择
我也觉得是唯一的选择
可是，如果我教书了，在我班上发生
我还能够选择逃吗？

Im Not Counsellor

I cant be counsellor
I tot can solve everything well
I tot I can be a good teacher
I tot I can face everything calm
I tot I can
But I cant actually.

Accidents happen in One and Suddenly
I got shocked
I lost my mind

The student shout at me
I can calm n endure
But I cant persuade
I dont even know what am I talking
Talk like nonsense

Accident happens right in front of my eyes
I lost my soul and I did nothing but call for help
Where it goes, my calm mind?

When I see the other counsellor speak to them
I want to cry out
They are full of love
I so disappointed to myself that I cant do like them
I just.....
Not talented.

I know nothing but only jokes around with them
Play together with them
Talk nonsense with them
BUT THAT ISNT MY JOB!!!
My job is to counsel those who need!
My job is to solve the accidents n problems!
NOT JOKING N TALK NONSENSE!

Im Not Counsellor.
Im Not Talented.
I Dont Think I can be a good teacher.
Should considerate about quit my studies.

Everything I tot I can.
When I do in full confidence
Then I found that I actually CAN'T

I HATE
the confidence which bring disappointment
from where i got those confidences?
I HATE THIS KIND of ME!
NUTS!

不甘愿的心

大致上
不甘愿
就是当你被强迫或者被逼做某件事时产生的

其实更难过的是
当某些因素
使你愿意做你不想的东西时
也会产生不甘愿的心

打个例子
这个周末，我原本计划好了一些节目
可是老爸说要去Segamat & BatuPahat 然后去 PJ 开会。。。。。。
我原本拒绝了
可是后来
老爸说要我开车
我知道我有说“不”的理由
我有这个权利
但是。。。。。。。。。。。
老爸都这年纪了
要开3小时车到Segamat然后又去BP 还要去KL
哥哥又不懂给什么借口不去

有时候我真的觉得我应该学习如何拒绝人
我好像很多时候都不懂得说 不
好听来讲是孝顺，不好听的是笨！
害自己新加坡读书 不成 当老师去
害自己失去了初恋
害自己的计划成了泡泡

超级不甘愿的
勉强去做这些事情

尽管我是答应了
尽管我愿意了
可是心还是有很多的不甘愿

其实不只是在孝顺这方面而已
事奉时也一样

很多时候
我只是觉得我不做不行
非得做
而去做
结果就带着不甘愿的心完成了

到最后
我依然觉得我的付出
根本没有价值
没有甘愿的心完成的
别人看来很完美
可是我自己知道
根本没意思！

我很愧疚
尝试过消除这些不甘愿的心
可是每当想起
“如果我不必做这些事，我现在应该是在。。。。好快乐！”
不甘愿的心，怎样都消除不了

你说该怎么办呢？

咖啡，让人又爱又恨。

咖啡
让人又爱又恨

像我这种
喝了咖啡睡不着的咖啡爱好者
好痛苦你知道吗

贪喝的我
刚才去喝茶的时候
点了没尝过的 Old Town Mix It Mint Base Cookies Crumbs White Coffee

结果
到现在还精神满满的

都是咖啡惹的祸！

一而再，再而三的提醒自己不要在晚上喝咖啡了
可是，欲望的冲力太大，它一直引诱我，我受不了。
其实在我点单的时候，我想了很久。。。
最后还是点了，因为我找到借口说：“很久没喝了，今天很累，应该能睡。而且有是冰沙的，很薄的啦，没问题的。”

可怜的我
就是这样
死性不改
一错再错
经不起考验
受不了诱惑

王八蛋
你几时才能生生性性
几时才能控制你自己

男人？？？

有时候我觉得我自己很奇怪
为什么电视剧里的男主角对爱情都能那么潇洒
而我却像那女主角一样依依不舍、念念不忘、放不下
有时候我会怀疑我到底是不是男人


原本应该是我来安慰你的
可是现在看起来是你在安慰我
你还是比我成熟


我好失败

爱情的不公平

爱
就是那么的不公平

你牵走我的心
可你的心我却碰不到

爱
就是这样
轮不到你来操控

The Main Reason

Thank you for telling me the main reason.
You are not wrong.
I didnt blame you.
Dont remorse.
You didnt hurt my rubbish heart.

Actually i feel quite well
Enjoying my single life
Sometime can taste the bitterness of missing you
Can disturb you when im bored
Can consult you when i have problems

Our relationship now is very comfortable
Future is in God's hand.

遗憾的遗憾

遗憾很痛苦
可想而知
遗憾的遗憾更痛苦

有了遗憾
想努力的补偿失败
来补救或挽救这个遗憾

谁知
挽救的行动失败
造成了一个更大的遗憾

这种感觉
就是好像“永不超生”
因为这遗憾的遗憾无法挽救了

遗憾

遗憾

这个东西产生就是

本来能够做到的，

原本努力就能够的，

可是实际上却做不到。

也许是因为胆怯，害羞的心理障碍导致某件事在实际上无法实现

结果就形成了“遗憾”

遗憾

是会让你心理不平衡

骂自己为什么那么胆小

责备自己为什么不去努力

生气自己为什么那么不争气

遗憾

会让你无法积极起来

你会一直想说如果办得到的话会多么的幸福快乐

这种消极的想法就会让你尽可能寻找自以为逻辑的借口来安慰自己

为的就是剥削遗憾带来的伤害

总而言之

遗憾

大家都讨厌！

我的『猪朋』『狗友』

我有一对很８的朋友，叫作『猪朋』『狗友』。
先介绍
『狗友』
第一印象：凶凶的，很严格，超级有原则，精打细算一毛钱都绝对不会欠。
可是后来，她受到某人的刺激下，为了脱身，拼命跟我搞绯闻。不知道原来她可以玩到那么颠的。因为她，无辜的我卷入他们的感情世界。还被封“狗男女”。不过，跟她玩还蛮开心的。有时候，她讲话比我还毒，非常绝，没有给人找到余地的。



『猪朋』
第一印象：笑的时候很可爱，圆圆的她自称水肿。后来被我们洗脑后，自称是猪。
后来她不懂受到什么刺激，应该是没有钱买爱情小说，或者她的愿望也许是当爱情小说家。她不知道为什么突然很关心我的爱情生活。
不知不觉，她成为我倾诉的对象了。

今晚，偶然的机会下，我们一起出来逛。谈心。
我本来以为
倾诉后会好过一点，
可是，
却让我更想念你。
让我更放不下你。

她曾经问过一个问题
就是你给过我什么东西

我的答案不知道怎么翻译华文
这个答案也是我想你知道的，就是

You gave me a Better Me, that is why I love you so much.

The phone is same like the owner... USELESS when in need.

Thinking deeper...

why should i scold my phone?

as the owner is just the same...

Totally useless every time in need.

Damn the phone and the owner.

Useless!!

I HATE YOU AND YOUR OWNER!

@#$%^&*()

GRRRR!!!

 :@

PEK CEK WITH HANDPHONE

When i need the phone.... the phone always low battery...

when I dont really need it... it always full battery....

DAMN!

Why emergency always came when my phone is low in battery...

When i replying ur msg, it always low battery and i cant get to charge.

Why these always happened?

Why so many BAD COINCIDENT on me??

DAMN the stupid phones!

Always out of battery when i really need it.

DAMN YOU!! I HATE YOU!!! STUPID PHONE!!!!

My friend in need but I cant help indeed.

So sudden when i get the call from him.
I can feel sadness and tears from his voice.
He hit the steel fence with his fist
All sort of vulgar words coming out of his lips
Tears drop
but I only watch in silence.

I cant do anything
I dont know what can i do for him.
I dont know how he really feel
I dont know clearly about his situation
I cant judge who is right and who is wrong
I did nothing but remain silence

He even kneel down
He tried the best to get things right
He is working very hard

and I?
did nothing in silence.
Didnt help out anything.
how useless....
then i ran away.
driving my little car around for 2 hours
just to waste the stupid slow mover times.
Starbucks Chocolate Cream Frapp is nice~
It cheers ppl's mood.
Thank you.

又开始烦你了

我想说，对不起。
我的毛病又发作了
又开始烦你了
一天没发信息给你，手好像会痒
不知道为什么
最近总是会想起你
不知道为什么会想念你了
难道我真的还放不下吗？
我不知道
我只知道
我正朝着“Good Man”迈进
我应该还抱着希望
想追回你~

知错，但改不了

我知道错了
我知道为什么你会这样了
原来是我造成的

冷酷无情的我
害你觉得被排坼
你说你只需要我的一个微笑
而我当时冷酷的不给你
我只顾着忙我的
没理会你
我的确排坼你

是我造成的
我不应该这样
我错了
对不起

我该怎么办？
是我害的
怎么办？
怎么办？

都是我的错

当初
大家都反对
是我支持你

给了你警告
你没放心上

尝试开导你
你当成批评

是我造成你的错
是我不够关心你
是我不够了解你

如果我知道你会变成这样，当初我就该阻止你

你怎么能说你现在下地狱你也甘心呢？
你有没有想过我的感受？
如果我能上天堂的话，你明白我的感受吗？
那种内疚，你了解吗？
难道你要我在快乐的天堂，愧疚的看你受苦，
你要我在天堂里自责？

我曾经失去了一个朋友，我答应不会再有这事发生
现在我失败了

是我没有去了解你的环境
是我没有真正的去关心你
我的爱心不足
你跌倒，我没及时给你帮助。
请你怪我，别怪神。

希望你能认真反省。
欢迎你回来。

你是我认识的朋友吗?

你已经不是我从小认识的朋友
你变了。
当初给你的警告现在都发生了
你忘了。

对不起，没能完全了解你。
对不起，没能阻止你跌倒。
是我关心不够，爱心不足。

请你认真想一想我刚才所说的一番话。

原来已经错到那么离谱了

今天的喝茶
让我失去了一个朋友

这真的是出乎我预料
最严重的就是他说了一句：
"如果明天神要让我下地狱，当初祂就不会让我认识祂”
那一刻
他突然成了陌生人
我很肯定，这个人我不认识。
我以前就知道他很喜欢哲学
可是我无法想象他的哲学已经比我还要厉害了
到了这么严重的地步。

我不认同他的理念
他就一直说我不了解他
说我没有同理心
说我乱批评他
他一直暗示我，要我可他一起做amway，这样才能了解他。
他怎么变得这样？

奉主耶稣圣名祷告，
慈爱的主耶稣基督，
我的朋友，跌倒了。
我该怎么做？
为什么他会变成那样？
他好固执，认为自己绝对，我只说他错了，他就无法接受，还生气了。
主啊！
他跌倒，是我的错。
我没有好好带领他
当初是我支持他的
我们当初的警告
他没放在心上

主啊！
求你带领你的羊儿回来
解救他固执的心灵
让他回到正道上

哈利路亚
至高者全能的耶稣基督
求你别放弃他
我会尽力让他回头的。
我尽力！
他只是误入歧途，一时迷路。
我相信他还有希望的！求主带领！
阿门

我还不够成熟

我无法原谅自己的无知
那个幼稚 我好白痴！

当我坐在你后面
看着你的背影
心就中了寒剑
脑海中不断地重复我之前对你说过的那些无知幼稚的话
回想起来
我真的好白痴

我无法原谅自己
我还是克服不了
我真的好低能

对不起

固执的执著

我发现
原来
我对许多事情
都有着非常固执的执著。

今天有件事让我很迷茫。

我不知道我为什么会有这样固执的执著
可是这些执著如果按照我自己的思维
我觉得这些执著都很合理，都很应该，都没有错。
可是朋友们的思维却是相反。
他们觉得我很残忍，他们认为我很不应该。

我该如何是好。

只是华文学会举办的唱歌比赛。
我们班没有人自愿参与
最后投票结果就是以抽签方式解决。
当签做好后，全班人一窝蜂的抢。
我就是那个最后第三个慢吞吞的抽剩下的签。
结果我没有中奖

那些中奖的就那边哭得可怜。
然后有一位哭到最可怜的要求我的朋友来劝我参与代替她的位。
我拒绝，他们都认为我残忍。认为我不应该。
可是
我只是觉得，既然大家决定抽签方式，就得接受其结果啊！
而且我根本不想参加这些比赛。
他们一直称赞我唱歌很好听啦什么啦。
其实他们不知道
他们越赞我越不要参加

不是我自夸还是自恋
我知道我的声音不是很好听
可是最近我唱那首《藏》我自己也觉得好听
这样才可怕
我怕我骄傲
我现在已经很软弱了
我怕我会走入魔道。
我坚定的拒绝一切。


结果
换来的是
朋友们对我的批评。

他们使到我开始怀疑自己是否做错事了
她哭
是我的错吗？
我不帮她
我错了吗？
帮了她，自己陷入危难，不合我的逻辑。

你能否告诉我
我对还是错了？

爱走了 我听见幸福说抱歉

绿茶 - 爱走了
让我想起了你

“ 爱走了
我听见幸福说抱歉
我只求你会过得精彩
我不会再哭 装作已经觉悟
我依然相信还没结束
爱走了我听见幸福说抱歉
该结束我比谁都清楚 ”



曾想过要为你付出一切
以为我们能够一起拼出一幅完美的图
但是我很清楚
爱走了
都该结束了

拿起来好容易
放下却那么难

我不知道我几时能把你放下
我不知道我几时能不再想你
可是我知道这一切都该结束

I rather insomnia...

Yesterday was an insomnia night.
Why?
Miss her.
gosh! Forget her!
No, I rather insomnia!

新学期

应该放下儿女私情这个沉重包袱
这个时候的我还没资格背这个包袱
害人害己的事也该停一停了
我一定要振作！等我练成好男人的时候再见！

完

看来我是真的很烦。
对不起。
你那么美，又有才华，贤德兼备
而我是那么的一般般。
很抱歉造成你的困扰。
希望这不会造成我们之间友谊的阻碍。

大受打击

我是怎么啦
妒嫉还是嫉妒？
怎么心好像有点不舒服呢？
不是一点
好像很多点
啊~
做么要称赞别的男人。。。。。
T.T

好像觉得自己真的像她讲的那样。。。mentally younger 4 years
幼稚到妒嫉。。。。
哦
真失败~

没朋友的可怜虫

假期了
感觉很闷
不能和朋友去醉
又不能赌
那些比较好行为的朋友又在外国
有的在读书
他们都很忙交课业
只有我假期
怎么这样？
好闷！
感觉好像宅男
和荧幕里的人做朋友
这种感觉
好可怜。。。
非常讨厌。。。
我的social圈子好像越来越小
小到只剩我的家人
我很讨厌这种感觉
我到底该怎么办？
是否该去club认识一些疯狂的朋友，至少生活精彩一点啊~
可是他们都说这种地方很多陷阱
可是也有不少弟兄也有去啊~他们也是好好的啊，没事啊！我应该也能跟他们一样的嘛。。。
啊。。。
好闷~
朋友
我好像那种没有朋友的可怜虫！

绝望中的希望

这些年，可说是我人生的最低最糟糕的
所以很久很久都没写部落。因为我不想记录下我丑陋消极的一面。
、
这些年，
我在许多事情上，统统失败了
我发现，我身边少了朋友
因为他们开始走在罪恶的道路上


而我
孤单的，不与他们一起走，但我却迷了路
我在黑暗中不断的彷徨
无助的等待阳光的出现
结果我一直等到绝望了。。。

绝望中的我
给自己判了死刑
认定自己无药可救了
因为我一而再再而三的尝试爬出黑暗的陷阱
可是最后跌得更深更伤
放弃了自己
认定自己已经到了谷底
跌到不能再跌下去了
永远不可能爬出来了

我失去动力
只有等死的耐心
我完了

这个时候
让我看到了这节
赛 48:10 我 熬 炼 你 ， 却 不 像 熬 炼 银 子 。 你 在 苦 难 的 炉 中 ， 我 拣 选 你 。
神拣选在苦难炉中的我
只要我胜过这个黑暗陷阱
只要我成功突破它！
只要我重新振作！
只要我赢了自己
神一定会拣选我的！
所以我必须要加油！
一定要做到神再也没有理由不拣选我！
我相信神还爱我的
只是神要我得胜，神相信我有能力得胜！我不能不相信自己啊！加油！今天开始加油！
忘记背后，努力面前，向着标杆往前冲！

Informal Letter

Dear blog, How are you? Long time no see. I'm sorry that I had abandoned you for so long. I was extremely hectic. After assignments have ISL folders plus a lot of events held by school and BC Club. Recently I was being hated by my classmates. Those girls are dislike me now. Last Saturday, there is an event held by unit PJ sem5. This event is damn irritating. We are forced to send 10 person to attend and pay RM10 for it. I felt like been bullied and forced to pay money. What is this school? This is how they earn money! I want to complain! How can this happen here? Forced to attend and forced to pay. Then I wish to have 10 girls to attend because I heard that Blok A girls are not allowed to back home as their waden commanded them to stay back for gotong royong. At the end, it canceled and I was angry with my PKU because she is damn NOOB! I dont know how to describe her. She is just... NOOB~ best word to describe. Fine, I was a person who is unfair in their eyes now. Ex-KU is better than me. FINE! When i was chosen to be KU, I had predicted this incident. I'm well-prepared to overcome it. I am now lonely, and I am not longer an active person in class. I am not longer a talkative person in class. They don't chat with me now. They ask anything through ex-KU. They not satisfied with me. Time passes slow. When can I get rip of these stupid heavy jobs? Why am I so stupid that I never outsource to other ppl? I am an IDIOT! I am a bad guy. Wish to change, but fail until now. Super lousy! Blog, sorry for murmur to you. I'll be fine soon, hopefully. Your truthfully, Yang

Holy Spirit?

Why?
almost 10 years I had prayed for it.
And i still cant get it.
Why?
God dont like me?

Always i wish to change.
At the end, Im still the same.

Act, as a strong guy.
Yet, i am damn weak.

I really want to change!
But why I cant make it?
Why always fail?
Why I am so weak?

I just lost my heart!
Losing my faith!

Blamed God for not giving me Holy Spirit.

Sorry.

I am so wrong.
I am so weak.

Sigh....

Such a useless guy...
wasting oxygen on earth.
Can i end my sucks life here?

Heartlost

Currently facing a great problem....
I lost my heart.
I dont know where it goes...
I just heartless to do anything....
Interpret
Sabbath Service
Youth Fellowship
RE class
EVEN PRAYER!
heart is lost...

I can feel that im quite far away from God.
Im in super danger...
Anyone can help me? T.T
get my heart back.
Pls.

A call~

Just a call today....
Im cheered up.
Thank you....
The call is just ON TIME!
When i need it...

U dun ask me wat we chat....
U only can know... Im so happy now...
Until i cant fall sleep.
Haha...

Dear YY
Thank you very much.
I love you so much.

LINK ERROR! GOSH

http://59.126.203.157/book/two/index0208.htm

omg... why this link cannot open liao?
wat i gonna teach today? =(

First Time write Surat Tunjuk sebeb.

Yesterday, 2March.
Early morning
We late to go assembly.
on the way to our class...
we were caught
asked to write Surat tunjuk sebab.
lol....
first time in my life.....
wat a nice memory....

Dirty painting

After i ponder for a few days...
concerning WHO AM I?
"Be yourself, the special self"
but who am i?
I found tat, im a dirty painting.
Im dark, full of dirt... Ugly....
Im bad
Naughty
Low EQ
Hot temper
Stiff neck
a lot more...
I know this is not ME!
but it had become ME.
I should change this design.
I should start a new design.
I should do it now!

I wants to be a better person!

This Mean You

Ytd i went to watch
It's a comedy of Spy Against Spy.
Damn funny... but it has a lot dirty riddles.

HOWEVER!!!!
I found a quote which is so meaningful.
and i just modify it to suit for me. >.<
it is:

Do not find a girl who is best for you
but find a girl who can make you a better guy.

Did u saw it in my fb post? hehe
This Mean YOU!

I found a girl who can make me a better guy...
You are the one!
And I know, I must make you a better girl too! ^_^

BUT
do u know wat happen?
My dad commented on it. GOSH!
He said: "You are not supposed to find a girl. References: Gen 2: 21-22."

OMG! What a shock~

anyway, i still believe that... You are my bone of bone, flesh of my flesh...
God prepared you for me. I'll pray for that.
U must be curious why im so confirm...
Because With You, I became a better guy...
A guy who knows to serve in zealous...
A guy who stir up his faith like fire...
A guy who is willing to serve God...
U made me practices all these theories.

So.....

I love You~

Scolding in REU

Today I scolded Amos during my class.
Because he is not serious in singing hymn n prayer too.
His eyes was wet nearly cry out but he didn't.
What a strong man.

He made me recall myself at the age like him.
I was just same like this, I'm even worse.

Somehow I felt regret for scolded him.
Can we scold in REU?

I just post n hope that. He can change after my.scolding.
Hallelujah...

在设计着自己

我仍然在设计着自己
到底该成为一个怎么样的人？
到底该做什么？

我的朋友们都结伴一起去了club摇。。。
喝到醉醺醺
他们都设计成一个他们所谓的“男人”

我知道我不能跟他们一样的设计
但是
我该怎么设计呢？

我设计过很多
最后还是失败
又开新的一面
但不会设计了

到底我应该是要成为安安静静的呢？还是叽叽喳喳的？
应该要认真的？还是爱开玩笑的？
应该要酷的？还是拽的？
开放 还是 保守?

怎么办？
我的朋友们好像越来越跟我的设计搭配不上了。。。
我应该改一改我的设计吗？

黑了

BIG 回来
黑了
4天没有sms你
回来后
打开手机
竟然没有你的信息！
啊！
那一瞬间真的有突然黑掉
可是后来看到你在这里留言
总算亮回了
哈哈

其实我在那里
一直很后悔没有带电话去
不然就可以sms你

哈哈
算了
结束了
又可以sms你了
得好好珍惜这种机会。。。

被掳了

以为都是小事一桩
结果引来忙碌一身

在这冷酷的环境中
不管水滚了多久
始终会冷却

在这忙碌的生活中
不管努力了多少
始终会崩溃

虽然早已知道
却万万想不到
才过了一个月
我就被掳去了

I was defeated.

January

Wishes... Hopes... Determinations.... Dreams.... Are just like the flame which had a lot of oil...

Now it is February.

Where is the heat? Where is the flame?

I was drown by assignments, presentations, events and a lot stupid stuffs as i am KU this sem.

The flame extinguished.

I got no more energy to do any other things.

Started the murmurs...

Having the mind to give up.

But there is no way....

I choose to escape....

I did...

And now, I feel sorry....

Im just too lazy....
I can do it.......

But i just dont want to get so tired.

excuses given by myself...

Why always me?

Im the youngest....

Why me?

those elder are dead?

Haiz...

I shouldnt do it.

Im sorry...

God, pls stir me up like fire....

Pls....

I was defeated.

T.T 

PLEASE~~~~~~~~~

陳勢安 - 再愛一遍

再愛一遍

詞/曲 陳柏圻

爭吵了千百回 想法打上了死結
失去愛滋潤點綴 一切都事與願違
關係瞬間下墜 以為介入的是誰
原來是我不了解 填補你心靈空缺
最後結局沒有好過一些 認定你我都做了分手準備
還是習慣你來陪 不再是裝作無所謂
可否回到當初那份感覺

因為失去而失眠 多想堅持到終點
從不曾斷了思念 不顧在愛的危險
盡力在心裡默念 祈求能再愛一遍
知道會傷痕累累我也不後悔
希望上天賜機會 而我會不顧一切
用盡每天和每夜 再次陪著你流淚
已經瞭解了心碎 就讓我停止淚水
再愛一遍是最後語言

每次我想更懂你 
我们却更有距离 
是不是都用错言语 
也用错了表情 

其实我想更懂你 
不是为了抓紧你 

我只是怕你会忘记

有人永远爱着你~

Please Don't Give Up On Me~

Wanna know you more.

Im sorry...
I just simply wanna text u...
I know I dont know you very well...
But I wish to know you more....
Im learning....
Im exploring...
Im trying to understand you...

Please allow me to get to know you much more...

U r worth waiting for....

=D Happy!!! hehehehehe~

Sumhow, sumtimes. I do miss you.
Ehe. Nite.
                            02:36, 29 Jan 2012

Heee~~
Cant stop smiling....
=D

PERFECT

u know what, u r so perfect.

sometimes i just feel like....
u r so perfect.
yet, im so imperfect

Im not handsome
Im not smart
Im not talented
Im just simple poor guy with a lot bad virtues.

i just curious. Do I suit you?
ahh~

I shouldnt think that.
I am going to be a good man.
To suit u the perfect 1.
Yes, thats my aim!

永不放弃你！

追求爱情虽然是盲目的
但放弃爱情才是悲哀。

=D

Im happy..

just a short chat with u every night b4 u sleep.

felt satisfied. =)

Do u know, bible in basic english is nice.

1 Corinthians 13:4 (Bible in Basic English)

4 Love is never tired of waiting; love is kind; love has no envy; love has no high opinion of itself, love has no pride;


Love is never tired of waiting.
I love you.
I will wait you.
Im yours.

新年愿望

希望能在新的一年里

学习爱主耶稣。

今年先这一个。
只是 一个，应该很容易。

祝我 成功。

唯有你

让我心动的女人有很多
让我愿意付出一生的女人唯有你。

Kill me if I'm back to the old me.

Right now.
I gonna kill the old me.
Be someone new!
Pls!
Always keep the promises.
Always rmb God's watching...
Always glorify God's name.
Take back ur broken confidence....
Fight everything hindering!

ROAR!

Born a new Good Man!
She love good man!
Sha hate old me!
Must keep in mind every second!

A good man will never make his girl disappointed.

is Falling

haiz....

Im falling now...
just 3 weeks of school...
now i begin to fall...
Strength is finished.
Lost all the promises and determinations which made b4 these.
Forgotten to keep them.
Strengthless to withstand
I hate myself now.
Stupid strengthless evil ugly me!


Dear,
You are always my motivator.
You are my source of strength.

I need you desperately.

Without u, i cant get my real smile on.

‪吳建豪 - 有你在‬‏

太多话 哽在我胸怀
太倔强 不要你陪伴
来不及 证明的未来
会在哪 为了我等待

有你在 牵手就能取暖
有你在 拥抱就能勇敢
如果时间倒转 有你在
你不喜欢的我会改
有你在 平凡就不平凡
有你在 遗憾就能美满
如果生命重来 我坦白
你会懂我的爱

当秘密 被真心揭开
当伤害 我全都明白
带回来 回忆和期待
只有你 不能被替代

有你在 牵手就能取暖
有你在 拥抱就能勇敢
如果时间倒转 有你在
你不喜欢的我会改
有你在 平凡就不平凡
有你在 遗憾就能美满
如果生命重来 我坦白
你会懂我的爱

有你在 有你在

Fall sick.

Ytd midnight... suddenly stomached. Went to toilet...
it's liquid! GOSH!
then easy 10 minutes i run to toilet...
DAMN PAINFUL!
rather to have nightmare....
until the run raise... then i getting fever...
took all sort of organic stuffs.
Patient fruit juice, propolis, herbals, honey lemon... blah....
until today midnight only recovered.

Why I fall sick?
Saturday whole day i eat food bought from outside.
Breakfast NasiLemak, Lunch Laksa, Dinner at church.
Then church got reunion feast, they prepared nuggets satay chicken...blah... all meats.
then supper Bro Ocenn make his cendol..(made from chemical) >.< honestly, not nice. summore the cendol is not cooked well...

All these blended in my stomach.. then i fall sick.

Teaching:
Never eat food from outside.
I gonna learn cooking...
I gonna protect my family...
I gonna cook for them.
I gonna make all of them healthy!


During the time i was sick.
im strength-less!
I hate when i am strength-less.
I am a man!
Head of family!
I had the responsibility to protect my family!
If I am strengthless, how can i protect them?
therefore, NO MORE FALLING SICK!
I must learn to protect myself b4 i can protect my beloved.
It will be my last illness!
I am a strong man!

被你影响

today is a Happy Sabbath
I enjoy very much in church.
It's the first time im so enjoy.
Well... today i interpret to Malay...
it's high lvl interpret... have to speak sambil listen the next sentence...
fuh.... anyway.. i did it... i interpret the points. >.<
at least he can understand la... hehe...

Today's choir... a song... very nice...
it's the post below...
a nice song...
touched me...
the beginning of the song already make me wanna cry...
oh... God is great...
really...
Pray more....
Someone is praying for you... i truly know that!

hehe...
after all..
i enjoy in church..
is because...
i wanna be a good man... =)
I wanna become the man who you love.

Because of you...
I know the importance of serving God.
Thank you for your motivation...
I am motivated to be very zealous.
I will...
in 2012!
although i still have many bad habits...
but i will change one by one...
little by little...
one day...
I will be the salt and light of the world which able to glory Daddy's name.
HALLELUJAH!

Someone Is Praying for You

When it seems that you've prayed 'til your strength is all gone,
and your tears fall like raindrops all day long
Jesus cares and He knows just how much you can bear
He'll speak your name to someone in prayer

Have the clouds 'round you gathered in the midst of a storm
Is your ship tossed and battered Are you weary and worn
Don't lose hope someone's praying for you this very day
And peace be still is already on the way

Someone is praying for you
someone is praying for you
And when it seems you're all alone, and your heart would break in two
remember someone is praying for you.

What is love?

1 Corinthians
13:4 Love is never tired of waiting; love is kind; love has no envy; love has no high opinion of itself, love has no pride;
13:5 Love's ways are ever fair, it takes no thought for itself; it is not quickly made angry, it takes no account of evil;
13:6 It takes no pleasure in wrongdoing, but has joy in what is true;
13:7 Love has the power of undergoing all things, having faith in all things, hoping all things.
13:8 Though the prophet's word may come to an end, tongues come to nothing, and knowledge have no more value, love has no end.

因为她爱好男人！

“男人不坏，女人不爱”
这女人是坏女人

She find me just now!

Wohoo!
it was unexpected surprise!
Why today I keep meeting happiness? >.< is it because of the tie clip if "True Jesus Church"? Yes, just now i put up a tie and the TrueJesusChurch clip. Then when i go find my BI lecturer, she praise me. She said:"You are good, you are a nice guy." Before that, when i first met her, she said:"You are sweet." because the night b4 i disturbed her and i just simply say "sorry for disturb" maybe that is why she say im sweet. >.<

then when i finished class and came back to hostel, there is a new in-take teacher.. who older than me, he called me 学哥. Omg! i became a senior! hohoho....

but..
the most happy thing is that...
You text me! and the reason is because she is boring! wohoooo!!!
Yeah! Dont know what to say... just very happy....

Yes, I am very free....whenever i got ur msg.


Haha!
Cant describe well...
Just....
Im so happy today!
Thanks God for blessing me....
I love you God. muack!

无聊

好无聊
上网随便看看
突然看到“孤独症”
就读到说
患者通常有超强的记忆力，数学技能，音乐天赋。
专家也说，可能是孤独症造就他们又这些才能。
读读下，又想到你去。。。
哈哈。。。
不是在怀疑你有这种病啦。。

他们都说
artistic的人都有一点怪怪的。
哈哈，记得以前我常常ponteng去找counselor
然后做personality test,我也是属于 artistic 的
虽然我没有音乐才能，没有很强的记忆力，数学还可以罢了，画画也不是很好。。。
可是，我是怪人，所以就属于artistic 了。。。哈哈哈

不知道你是不是属于 artistic 的
哈哈

很想你。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。

only love

3am
And the rain isn't falling.
Here I am
On the bed can't sleep again.
I try my best to stop missing you
But I can't, I want miss you also....

Only love can say
Try again or walk away
But I believe, for you and me, the sun will shine one day
So I just play my part
Pray that you will have a change of heart.

Come back to my bosom
Enjoy to be loved
I'm waiting.

Wanna be with you

Im in heaven, when im with you.

Im a bad guy
Im a weak man
I need support from you.

You had entered my life,
You had entered my heart.

Somehow
I feel sorry to God,
because I love you more than Him.
I trying to persuade myself
to love Him more...
but im weak.
I need you.

Last time,
together we serve the Lord.
together we support each other.
and i done it well in all divine works.

u know what is my greatest achievement in 2011?
I have you in my life.
thats my greatest achievement.

With you, i found back my heart of zealous towards God.
With you, i found back the joy which i lost long time ago.
With you, i found the true love.
With you, i am strongest man.
With you, i no more failure.
With you, everything is perfect.

Dear,
two is better than one.
Let me make your life more blissful.

I miss you so much.

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

给未来的挑战

嗨，你好。
你也许不知道我是谁
我告诉你
我虽然不是超人
但我是打不死的小强！
就算你踩扁我
我还是会振作起来的
因为
我是男子汉
我是大丈夫
所以我不认识崩溃
我的字典里没有“放弃”

我的自信是打不死的！
来啊！
放马过来
你以为这样就能打垮我的自信？
我警告你，你越打击我，我就越强！
怕你的我，已经被我打死了！
去你的！乐观的人你是赢不了的！

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